Lewis Howes wrote a book called The School of Greatness, which I’ve read several times. It not only refers to how to advance your business but it focuses on what it takes to be truly happy. I follow him on Instagram and awhile back he posted 30 Habits for Happiness. I do follow many of the habits he discusses, however, there are so many that I don’t. It wouldn’t be honest of me to say that I will do them all at once, but I will focus on a few at a time. Here are a few of the habits that I want to work on starting now: believing in myself, putting my needs first, make the most of now and avoid social comparison.
Believing in myself has always been something I struggle with. I was bullied at a young age and I really think the struggle started then. Even when someone tells me I did or do a great job, I always doubt myself and think that I could have done better. I know this isn’t always the case, but trying to change this habit has been extremely hard for me. I know I’m a good person, I know I try to be as nice to people as possible and I know people look up to me. Starting today, I am going to start practicing believing in myself. If I catch myself doubting myself, I will correct how I am thinking.
Putting my needs first has always been a challenge. I am a very compassionate person with an outgoing personality (for the most part) and care so much about other people and I tend to forget about my own feelings. For example, when someone asks me to do something that I don’t feel comfortable with or that I do not want to do, I’m going to tell them. I’m not going to go along with it because I know it will make that person happy. Starting today, I’m putting myself first. If I catch myself doing the opposite, I will correct how I am thinking and acting.
I need to make the most of now. I always sit around and wait for people to want to hang out, go out to eat, see family and I always do things on other people’s time. That stops now. I can still do what other people want, but it also needs to be reciprocated and on my time as well. If I want to wake up before the sun rise so I can see it, I’m doing it. If I want to stay up all night and watch old movies, I’m doing it. If I want to go out and have a great time, I’m doing it. Starting today, I am making the most of now. If I catch myself doing the opposite, I will correct how I am thinking and acting.
Social comparison is a hard habit to change. I always compare myself to my friends that are happily married with children. For years, I have felt that I don’t belong anymore in the circle of friends that I have because I’m not happily married and I don’t have any children. My sister, brother-in-law and all of my cousins make a ton of money being doctors, lawyer, etc. I don’t have one of these jobs. I see the lives they live, the huge houses, the comfortable living style, how they go on vacations all the time and just how different they all are from me. Its been very hard sitting back and realizing my life will never be like theirs. Their lives might be pretty on the outside but you never know what is going on in the inside. Social media also makes things hard. You see what everyone is doing, but you only see the good times. Most people don’t post the bad times. That stops now. Starting today, I am not going to compare myself to anyone else. If I catch myself doing the opposite, I will correct how I am thinking and acting.
Hopefully, I can keep to these new habits. Once I have mastered them, I will move onto others. My goal is incorporate the 30 habits into my daily life.
The two pictures above are random pictures from this past summer. I love sitting on my back patio drinking ice coffee, eating fresh fruit and reading a good book. The other picture is of Lake Erie on a beautiful hot summer day.
To my new followers, welcome to Smiling Through Tears. This blog is a daily account of my struggle with mental health disorders. To all of my returning followers, thank you for supporting me and following my journey.